The money dragon has been rearing its head in lots of our lives lately. (You are not alone!) It bellows can be heard when you face money problems: you work part time to be able to spend time with your kids but have less income, you realize you’ve taken on a bigger car payment than you can afford, your cellphone and TV go on the fritz at the same time, rent is raised, or a big credit card payment is due.
This dragon rides on air currents of judgment and fear. “You’ll never get out of this situation. How could you get yourself into such a mess? I thought you had awareness, nummy.”
It strikes right at your heart, now heavy, and at your tummy, now full of jitters. It robs you of sleep and peace and the ability to see possibilities.
When the money dragon (or any dragon for that matter) makes an appearance in your life, your energy and attention scatters to the winds. The dragon sucks all your life, your breath, your focus. Your eyes are glued to the sky, alert for it’s next attack. You can’t seem to figure out what to do or fix, fast enough. You’re not sure what your priorities are. What options are best. What the most effective approach is.
Watch out! If you get stung by the money dragon’s tail, you might fall into what my dear friend Rita Rivera Fox calls the “bag lady syndrome” – the scary, and unlikely, image of you having no home, no friends, no support, no money, no food.
Before you sink any farther, I offer you an outstretched hand as my Rosemary Nichols once did for me. (Thank you Rose.) Her words of wisdom, which have been transcribed and Shaman Girl-ized will help you stand on more stable ground.
Here’s how to stop your dragon mid-flight:
1. Reach out.
Call a trusted friend. Find a website or Facebook page full of inspiration. (May I suggest Shaman Girl or Shaman Girl Facebook, wink blink?) It’s easy to feel ashamed or embarrassed. The temptation will be to slip into desperation. No matter how wise you are, outside perspective is vital. Hearing “it’s going to be okay” can be a lifeline. Simply speaking your fears out loud loosens their grip on you.
How often have you heard “take a deep breath?” And yet we often forget to regularly breathe deeply – especially when we are stressed. When you sit and check in, notice if you are holding on – in your shoulders, your jaw, your neck, your heart, your belly. Breathe gently into the constriction and exhale. Let it out. Let it go.
3. Make sacred time.
When we’re in the midst of crisis (or heck, our daily, busy lives), sacred time and self-care are often the first to get chucked out the window when they are most needed. If you can’t make an instantaneous change to your outer circumstances, at least you can do your best to tend to your inner world.
What lifts your spirits? What supports your body? Spend some time in nature (this is hugely helpful right now). Don’t skip the yoga class – or do a few stretches at home. Be creative on low-cost or no-cost ways to give yourself a break and create some positive vibes and breathing space. Take a drive. (Here’s where Rose has been going, to Sugar Hollow. Doesn’t the name just make you feel mo’ better?!)
4. Neutral can be good enough.
I prefer feeling content, happy, energized, clear. But when I’m low (or someone around me is low), it can be enough to head towards feeling neutral. Expecting energized and clear can just create more frustration.
You have awareness (usually) and are (normally) good at manifesting, right? So once you “see” what the problem is, there might be an underlying expectation that it should just resolve itself and go away. You’ve worked through some internal blocks and let go of some old energy, so why hasn’t your life/bank account/finances magically righted themselves?
Our physical reality operates a little more slowly than our spiritual/energetic one. It can take time to unwind your challenges and clean up your mess. After all, how long how you been believing/action/doing whatever got you into this situation in the first place? So it sucks, but some patience is in order. Repeat steps 1-5.
I like whirlwind transformation and new projects and moving forward. When I went to see Dr. Devorah Feinbloom for nutritional response testing and overall preventive health support, I happily dove into shifting my diet and taking my supplements. But when months later, I realized these shifts weren’t temporary. If I wanted the new results of feeling healthier and more energized, I’d have to keep eating my new diet and keep taking the supplements as an ongoing daily, lifelong practice to maintain a healthier lifestyle.
Same is true with transforming our relationship with money or our “poor me” voice or our family or [fill in whatever dragon you are wrestling with]. True transformation and results happen when we see a challenge clearly, clean out old beliefs and emotions, and take repeated new action.
So I am sitting with Scattered until I feel more centered. I am reassuring Anxious that it will be alright. I’m embracing Scared as I would my child. I’m looking the Money Dragon in the eye and refusing to let him steal the last ounces of my strength.
I’m reaching out to you, old Mr. Money Dragon. Enveloping you in my arms. Exhaling together. You may be huffing and puffing, but I’m still going to deeply take care of myself and my family. Do what I can. Take action. Trust. Be patient. Over time, I know that our encounter is going to make me wiser and more responsible. I will not cower in the face of your fire. In fact, I’ll take it and use it transform.